I wish.

I used to just wish I was a little bit taller (I wish I was a baller) but then life happened and I grew up and I got wise and mature and my hair grew, my boobs filled out and I still was not taller. So I moved on to wishing for things that might be more plausible. I wished for a college degree, a good job, great friends, a guy I could be cheesy and dorky with. Great shoes (with three inch hills that for a short time period, made me seem taller) and an ipod that played Michael Bolton, Boyz II Men, and the entire Dirty Dancing soundtrack. The problem is that shoes wear down, ipods run out of battery and need to be replaced, and a college degree will only get you so far.

So I'm always left wishing and wanting. Like most human beings, life is never enough. And today, I tried in vain to lure away my friend from her apartment, bf, job, and school in order to run away with me to wherever our credit cards could afford to take us. I say I tried in vain because I know that neither of us would ever leave our anything- we're not those kind of people. I'd never drop out of school (nor would she), we'd never leave our bfs (do you know how hard it is to find a good man?) and we'd never put ourselves in an unknown situation- where we're not sure how our bills are getting paid, when we'll have more money, and what we're eating for dinner.

So today, I don't wish I had new jeans or a new haircut (two things that have been on my mind lately) but today, I wish I was the kind of person who would go to Mexico/Italy/New Zealand on vacation, decide I loved it so much, and just stayed. Who didn't spend my life wishing I could live one way or the other, that just did. My bf is that kind of person- always reminding met hat I CAN go do x, y, and z if I want to, I just have to do it. It's hard for a person who thrives off stability and certainty to do things like that. But I've been wishing for 25 years (nearly 26) and it's time to run away to a brand new place where I'm happy enough to not want to run away. So this year will the be the year I run (not literally) to my happy place. I will be that girl that doesn't want to go somewhere but that does go somewhere. Whether it's a new city, a new job, or even a new country. Yes, no more wishing for me (unless it's for a new, magical way to make me a little bit taller, the Skeelo way).